The Scene: Henry Carved-Well is contemplating his next acting role after leaving the Suckerman franchise. Then one night he has a dream in which Now-Gone Brando who played Suckerman’s father in the 70s appears to him. Carved-Well: Great! I needed advice and my subconscious dream sends you. Why would I…
Robert Won’t-Go-Away of Simbabwe arrives the afterlife where he finds himself on a subway train, sitting next to Patrick Sway-Hips. Robert: Hey where am I? Is this train going to Heaven? It must be if you’re on it. Everybody likes Patrick Sway-hips, right? Haha if it were Kurt Rustle, I…
The Morning Show: With the me-too movement raging through America, The Morning Show takes on the touchy subject of sexual abuse while groping around for multiple sides of the story. The show is not so much an exploitation of a popular news subject as it is an opportunity to watch…
Ethanol was having great difficulty connecting to the internet. He had lowered himself from one of the cables attached to the ceiling so he could check the cables behind the computer. Even though Loafer had offered to help him sort out the problem, Ethanol loved to do things by himself…
Round-Eye Person gets off the phone after talking with his white sister Delicate Person. His wife, Best Person who knows everything is in the room and she can tell that it was a very sad phone call. Round-Eye: That was Delicate. She said the battery on the left, inside of…
StillBenchpress Starlone and Michael Big-Jaw Dan are on the set of yet another instalment in the Rockhead franchise when the trumpet sounds signalling the end of the world. Michael: Champ, it’s the end of the world, we need to suspend shooting and go to Heaven. Starlone: No way kid, if…
Even before he did it, Weird-scene Talentino knew that the ninth thing he did on Tuesday afternoon was guaranteed to be the talk of Hollywood for the rest of the decade: Just a few minutes after the eighth thing he did that afternoon which was pulling his Y-front underwear from…
Lawyer addresses the press: On behalf of my clients, a large coalition of religious people from different sects, these are the terms for forgiving Justice Small-lie and allowing him to be cool again. We believe that forgiving Mr. Small-lie will help rebuild his career as one of the gay people…
Ain’t-Wrong: Your honour, I would like to prove to this court that this legal-drama-slash-prison-show is an original concept and actually worth watching, even for people who would rather wait and binge-watch a show when it’s several seasons old. Prosecutor: What’s so special about this show that would make people leave…
Be Ready: You must always be ready because you never know when you will get that call: asking you to play your first action movie role. That phone call could come even when you’re about to be cremated, so don’t go assuming that it will never come. Never Stop: Once…
